Monday, August 25, 2014

Anniversaries That Just Slip By


Do you guys realize that just about each week in my life there is some sort of "Cancerversary" for me? Is that even a word?!

It is like this internal battle I have within myself to want to tell the whole world of each milestone, while at the same time, realizing that people know my story. I don't have to constantly put it in their face. Is is just SO good, it is hard to not tell everyone!

In May, it was 2 years from my first radiation treatment. In July, it was the 2 year anniversary of finishing my radiation treatments. 

This was the morning of my last radiation treatment. The ENTIRE Stanfill home was decorated. The stairs, balloons, a banner on their balcony, door decor--- the Stanfills do NOTHING halfway! Can you tell we miss them?!
This was after one of my lat-flap surgeries.
It was so difficult to even walk. I had the best
nurses. This is Andrea!
In July and August, it was the 2 year marks from my lat-flap reconstructive surgeries---wow, are there so many "emotional" anniversaries during that part too. Easily some of the toughest times.
This was after one of my lat flap surgeries. My drains were so huge and heavy. I had to carry them with my arms. Wow, I am SO attractive!
Then, just last week, it was a year on the (18th and 19th) from when I had my full body scans at MD Anderson and Dr. Litton gave me the official doctor "go ahead" to begin trying for our family. What an amazing day that was. 

Honestly really loving my CT drink. It was cranberry flavored!
Oh the times we have sat in this waiting room! Mom on one side, JT on the other. Love those two!
August 18th and 19th weren't just the fact that we could start growing our family. It was the fact that I was healthy enough for them to encourage it. A fear I faced for a long time (and still face in my darkest moments) was whether it was wise to have children. With the statistics on my life, I did not want to leave my son or daughter motherless.

A Year From Full Body CT

Here we are a year later. Oh the things that God has done! Oh what he will continue to do! I honestly thought that I would be pregnant the month after our doctor told us to go ahead. 

I thought, "It's going to happen immediately!" And I would shout it from the rooftops! But you know, with us having to wait like this, it has allowed us time to focus on what God HAS done. Baby or no baby--if our miracle story ended with my healing-- that is enough.

I know God has more planned, but what he has already done is enough.

I am a person who likes to move on to the next mountain, the next plan, the next step, but God has forced me to ruminate in where we are now. Not so much of where I'm going, but where I am.

Where are You?

Where are you? Now. Not where are you going, but where are you? Where has God brought you?

All I need is a "Cancerversary" to remind me of where I am. I am HERE. On planet earth. Breathing, alive, healthy and whole. 

If you are breathing and reading this, you are blessed beyond your wildest imagination. And that is where I find myself today. So, for today, stop and remember that you are alive.

You are here for a purpose. What can you do TODAY to savor your blessings?



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